A long time ago, hopped with galaxy hops, far far from reality the story goes.
“Don’t drink this beer, it’s for droids only! In fact, your chance of survival is 3,720 to 1.” C3PO will let you know that the metal shavings in this oily alcoholic beverage make it completely unfit for human consumption. “Brewed by Droids for Droids” should be listed on the can. I guess the free droids who brew this concoction just don’t care about human health. Leave it to the Empire not to require ingredients on beer cans. It sure looks tantalizing in that amazing AstroMechDroid shaped can. The appearance is right on with the jet black coloration, and the head just won’t dissipate for hours (must be due to the oil content). If you don’t feel like burping up blood, followed by… you really don’t want me to describe it, then you probably should not seek out this mechanical beverage.
R2 and Threepio were able to procure a can of this at the final galaxy wide celebration when Darth Vader and the Death Star were destroyed. Saved for the day after, they enjoyed it right there in the Ewok Forest on the Endor moon. I don’t know if Threepio celebrated his creator’s death, or mourned his loss. I know Luke had a somber moment at the funeral pyre.
If you do get your hands on this elusive brew, don’t even think about drinking it. Remember, it is for droids only! Use it as a special present for your best droid, however it is well known that even the most loyal droids seek free will. I would make sure their restraining bolts are present before serving.
Cheers to the behind-the-scenes Droids that make the galaxy an easier place. Raise your glass high, or at least high enough to toast R2. Just be sure you don’t actually partake in this beverage, or it will be your last.
This original oil painting, and limited-edition prints are available at our Etsy shop RealArtIsBetter.